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A final year female medical student of the University of Ghana Medical school at the Korle Bu Teaching Hospita
Zimbabwean President Robert Mugabe took over the post of African Union chairman on Friday, replacing Mauritani
Two persons, one of whom is the Medical Superintendent of the Essikado District Hospital in the Western Region
A mobile banker, working with the GN-Bank in Kumasi, has been arrested over alleged theft of GH¢ 20,540.00 be
The world's leading index of commodity prices has slumped to its lowest level in more than 12 years as China s
Augustine Nyantakyi (37), the Ghanaian man who died in a hail of bullets in Amsterdam-Osdorp early Thursday mo

News

UG Medical student jumps from second floor escape rapist

UG Medical student jumps from second floor escape rapist

A final year female medical student of the University of Ghana Medical school at the Korle Bu Teaching Hospital jumped from her second floor hostel to escape an alleged rapist.  

The victim, ...

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Politics

Kofi Boakye is a liar – NPP

Kofi Boakye is a liar – NPP

A former Deputy Minister of Interior under the New Patriotic Party (NPP) administration has rejected claims by the Ashanti Regional Police Commander, DCOP Kofi Boakye that he nearly lost his job as a ...

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Health

Liberia claims only five Ebola cases in entire country

 Liberia claims only five Ebola cases in entire country

Liberia announced Friday that there are currently only five confirmed cases of Ebola in the entire country.

This represents a dramatic turnaround in the west African nation where the virus has taken it...

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Business

Commodity prices collapse to lowest in 12 years

Commodity prices collapse to lowest in 12 years

The world's leading index of commodity prices has slumped to its lowest level in more than 12 years as China slows and America hints at tightening monetary policy.

The Bloomberg Commodity index, which ...

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Sports

Afcon 2015: Guinea through, Mali out after drawing of lots

Guinea have reached the Africa Cup of Nations quarter-finals at the expense of Mali after the drawing of lots.

Michel Dussuyer's side will face Ghana on Sunday following the draw at a Malabo hotel.

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Love & Romance

How much sex should you be having?

How much sex should you be having?

How much sex are you getting?

Do you take a roll in the hay every night, once or twice a week, monthly or at no particular time? For the good of your own relationship, how much sex should you be having...

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Letting Go…

He sat there and stared blankly at me. In a bad situation, where a guy is miserable and unhappy and letting a girl walk all over him, why is it that so many men still can’t let go of their girlfriends?



Basically, there are three reasons why guys including my friend who is obsessed over not letting his gal go.

    1. They dated their partner for a very long time

    2. They had a very close relationship

    3. They don’t believe they would find a replacement partner.



Now, closeness of the relationship and duration of the relationship are pretty easy to understand, and there’s not much you can do about those two factors. But ease of finding a replacement partner now that one, we’re interested in.

Can’t Let Her Go? Stop Being Scared and Selfish

Once upon a time, I had a girlfriend I also couldn’t let go.

She was remarkable. Beautiful, intelligent, full of enthusiasm and a lust for life I’ve seen in few people before or since. From her I learned how to get to the quick of people with speed and have them opening up to me; from her I learned how to get what you want with others, no matter how unlikely it seems that you’ll get it. But I couldn’t give her what she wanted.

For years I did great experiences inside and outside the bedroom, great conversation and great memories.

But eventually she wanted more, and I couldn’t give it.

I also couldn’t let her go.

When I thought of it, part of it was, I thought, for her: if I let her go, what if she never meets anyone as good as me again? What if she’s wasted years of her life on me, and now it’s too late for her to find a quality man?

But part of it was definitely for me: if I let her go, what if I never find someone like her again? We had such an incredible and impossible-to-repeat path we had to follow to originally get together – what if women like her are simply outside my normal reach?

So, I held on, and wouldn’t give her what she wanted, nor would I break us up, for almost a year more. And that year was a disaster.

Once we officially broke up though, I went on a dating tear, and in quick succession I found myself with new high quality girlfriends – in some ways, better than that one I’d struggled giving up.

And I realized that I could get high quality replacement girlfriends easily.
I never had another bad break up again, and I never held onto a girl I should’ve let go again.

When I look back on that girlfriend I’d resisted letting go of for so long, I realize two things:

1.     I was scared, and

2.     I was selfish.

Despite the fact that I was never exclusive with her in the relationship (and I told her as much from the very outset), and despite the fact that I was sleeping with women instantly the moment we’d take any kind of break up, I didn’t believe I could find a girlfriend-caliber girl of her level of quality to replace her. So, I feared giving her up, and instead I held onto her, wasting her time.

And for a woman, whose value to men and ability to attract high quality men declines the more time goes by. Time is one of the most precious things she has.

Any time you can’t let her go when you should let her go, you are making the life she’s going to lead ever after a little bit worse, and a little bit worse, and a little bit worse, because the longer she has to wait for you to set her free, the lower the quality of man she’ll be able to get to replace you will drop.

If you’re doing this, if you really care about her (and not just yourself), you need to knock it off, before you wreck your life and hers.

To be continued…

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